Of Grandmas & Frustration

As it turns out, my children not only bewilder my husband and I, but their grandparents as well.

Late last summer, we had to fly back to South Dakota, as my grandfather had suddenly passed away. My mother-in-law was a wonderful resource to us, because we basically handed her our children said "Here ya go! They don't eat this or this! Ooh and No.2 can't lose that paci or YOU will go insane!" and left for two days.

My MIL bravely stepped into a role that even on the best of days I cringe when thinking of what lies ahead of me. I say this because in the 5 years that we have had children, the grandparents have maybe seen them a grand total of a month, and therefore don't really know the idiosyncrasies of said children. At the time, the oldest was just a few weeks past 5 and the youngest was about 18 months old and very deep into the mommy-separation anxiety bit. But the MIL is no shy woman and she and her husband jumped head-first into their role.

One day as she was settling the kids down for naps, my oldest asked if they could watch a movie. The grands aren't very technologically advanced, as they spend most of their days working on their farm, and still have just basic cable and a VCR, neither of which are used very often.

As Grandma was struggling to get the VCR to function, she was muttering under her breath and getting pretty fed up with the whole bit. My 5 year old quietly came up to her, tapped her on the shoulder and said, "...Grandma...are you twenty-five??"

With a puzzled look on her face she responded, "Well, yes...in fact Grandma is a lot older than twenty-five! Why??"

To which my child replies, "We-lllll, because....um...if you are...there...there are these words you can say. . . if you're frustrated... you can use '25 year old words'"

By now my MIL is completely baffled. "Sweetie, what do you mean??"

"Well, when Daddy & Mommy are frustrated they say....some words....but they said you have to be twenty-five to say them."

D'OH!!!

Apparently my child does listen to my husband and I, and quite well as a matter of fact!! A few weeks before this, we'd had a bbq with some friends, most of which have no children. Being Air Force maintainers, their language is ...colorful to say the least. Our child, hearing some of this language from the friends and us later on, had attempted to expand his vocabulary with some of these words!! We promptly told him that there were just some words you couldn't say until you were a certain age. And of course he had to ask what age that was...so we said 25!

So, when seeing his obviously frustrated and overwhelmed grandmother struggling with the movie experience, he wanted to help her out as best he knew how. But he knew well enough NOT to say those "Twenty-five year old words" to Grandma and just...suggested she use them! Thankfully, MIL wasn't brave enough to venture into which words were considered acceptable for a 5 yr old and which ones were not, because I'm pretty sure any response she would have gotten would have probably caused her untimely demise as the eldest would have been more than happy to repeat those words in a 'matter-of-fact' manner!

It's never a normal day when you've got a 5 year old in your house, that's for sure.










Gma & the oldest drivin' the tractor in SD.

Sprechen sie English, bitte?

Being a military family living in Germany, we're constantly bombarded with information screaming at us to "blend in, don't stand out from the locals, yadda, yadda, yadda". And I truly believe that this information is meant for those service members living here without children. Although I don't know what makes us stand out more, my kids babbling 100 miles/hr in English or my husband's Chevy hat that he wears so proudly atop his head!

We're told to try to speak the local language when on the economy (meaning 'off base') and doing shopping or sight-seeing. Well that's fine and dandy...until your kids answer you back loudly AND in English. I mean, there's nothing like asking the restaurant manager, "Wo ist das tolietten?" and then having your child loudly announce, "MOMMY!!! I have to PEEEE.....NOW !!!!" and you just happen to be in the middle of some po-dunk German village on your way to Belgium.

The area we are currently in, thankfully has a high tolerance for our American presence here. And rightly so, for the most part, as the Americans stationed here bring in a ton of money for the Germans. Many of us live on the economy and are paying ridiculous amounts of rent and utilities for the homes we occupy. So most of the time, we don't really have to worry about 'blending in', the Germans know and accept that we're here and are more than happy to take our euros!!

Hi-ho, Silver! Awaaaaay!

There are just some things, that as a parent, you never imagined yourself saying. Take & plant your family in a foreign country, and these things can tend to get even stranger, but that's another story.

For instance, I never thought I'd have to tell my five-year-old, "Son, please don't ride your brother down the stairs..." But I did.

Little background..we have a large yard at our house and there is a small set of curving, concrete steps leading from the front garage area, to the backyard. My two-year old takes much delight in traipsing up and down these stairs in any way the human body can possibly manage and endure. Some days we go up them on our feet, other days we roll down them sideways. One particularly brave day, said child attempted to come racing down the slope of the driveway to these steps on a "Lightning McQueen" ride on toy, and "power brake" around the curve and down the steps. Needless to say, the ending wasn't quite what he was imagining it was supposed to be, I'm sure.

But on this particular day, young child was attempting to walk down the stairs as say, a horse would. . . and in his five-year-old mind, the oldest just couldn't resist the opportunity that lay in front of him. Now, my kids are no skinny things, so my 50lb five-year-old wasn't exactly squashing is 33lb brother, per say, but it did look quite uncomfortable. But the five-year old seized the opportunity, sat upon his baby brother like a pony at the State Fair, and held on to brother's hair, and rode down the stairs, much to their parents dismay.

I will say that neither child was hurt even as gravity and physics took hold of them both and propelled them down the stairs. Concrete apparently doesn't hurt much when you're laughing like fools. And they even tried attempting it a second time, which could have very well been successful, until mom put the kibosh to it.

What's a little road rash between brothers, right?














By the way, their shirts describe them to a T!!!

Newness

Well thanks to the encouragement (or threatening?) of a dear friend from high school, I'm attempting this whole blogging thing.

However, you are all going to have to keep the panties out of a twist for a bit longer, because I have to go do some motherly & wifely duties...it never seems to end.

This should be an interesting journey as the blogs begin...I'm a mom of 2 rambunctious boys, ages 5 & 2, and they continually shock and amaze me with the many things they do.

I bid thee adieu, as I have to go get the hubster Subway for lunch!

Tschuss!